Whooooooooa (NO!)

I really want to know what the big friggin' deal is about Paramore. To me, they sound like Panic! At the Disco with a girl singer, and I think Panic! are grossly overrated as is. Frankly, if you have a punctuation mark in your band name (and are not a member of !!!, who are actually good), you're probably a bunch of pretentious, monotonous douchebags.

Hayley Williams does have a strong voice, but that's the only thing that makes her otherwise cookie cutter band unique. Their lyrics aren't profound, their live show isn't groundbreaking, and their material just isn't as mindblowing as I find people (read: tween girls with studded belts) make it out to be.

Also on my mediocre-to-shit list:

- The Honorary Title. I don't care if their frontman is or was dating Kelly Osbourne. Ozzy's money can't buy you a hook.

- Stores putting up Christmas displays before Thanksgiving. Why are we in such a rush? Life is so SHORT!

- Kanye West, for not putting his "Bittersweet" collaboration with my husband (shut up, a girl can dream) John Mayer on Graduation; but a bigger one to his mom's plastic surgeon. Godspeed, bro.

- The Junior Varsity for only just recently confirming their breakup, as well as for breaking up to begin with.

- And any band who feels the need to put their hidden tracks twenty minutes after the last song on a record.


*By Jess, who is excited for Monday!